Serving my Divine Saviour

‘Bhavin can join me for all dharmayatras.’ ‘Bhavin is ever smiling.’ ‘I like Bhavin.’

These words of my Gurudev mean the world to me. But, there is a long story behind these words – a story of love, training, patience. A story of creation of His piece, because from head to toe, I am my Master’s piece.

In this life Gurudev met me when I was 8 years old but I believe that our hearts were connected since a long time. Else why would I run and bow down at His Lotus Feet seeking blessings the very first time I saw Him! It was September 26, 1990 at the orphanage at Chembur, an apt date and place. My Saviour had arrived to liberate my soul, I found my Gurudev! Following this day, I joined the gang of children in the group. Once Gurudev was going for a dharmayatra and made all the children wear rakshapotli before He left. Everyone got it except me as there wasn’t an extra one for the new introvert boy. Meekly I was just about to turn around and leave, when He took my hand, took out His rakshapotli and made me wear it. He completed this gesture with His heart-melting smile. My eyes widened the size of marbles and my tiny heart skipped several beats as I kept staring at my wrist. I was the happiest kid in town and this incident cemented a feeling of deep security in my heart forever. Gurudev is always there.

A major turning point in my journey came during Diwali in 1997 at Palitana. I was a 14-year-old teenager and would see sevaks offer video seva and longed to do the same. All my friends would be playing cricket and I would loiter around the pravachan area in the hope that I would get to do some seva. Soon that moment arrived! Mehulmama told me that I can help in set-up and wind-up of the video equipment. I recollect how satisfied I used to feel in just helping them. Later, I asked for permission to allow me to use the video camera in the early morning bhakti and I got it. I would wake up early, do the set-up, set 2 cameras, start the video mixer and keep Param Krupalu Dev’s chitrapat as a constant image on one camera, take crowd shots from the other sitting at the back and use the video mixer at the same time. Some of the mumukshus really liked it and gave a positive feedback. Gurudev noticed me offering seva and commented in front of my friends that in this age when all were fond of playing, I was offering seva. He turned and told me that I should destroy all my karmas with this seva. From then on there was no looking back as I would excitedly jump at any opportunity to offer seva.

Back then, we would drive around going to different mumukshus’ houses and borrow their TVs for screening during satsangs and return them after use. I was very slim… Literally used to look like a hanger on which clothes are put. But I would happily choose the heaviest TV of the lot as I felt that heavier I would lift, the lighter I would become, as those many more karmas I would shed!!

I once got a call from Atmarpit Nemiji that I was to operate both audio and video for one of Gurudev’s Dharmayatras. I kept thinking about how I would be able to manage both and that it was going to be too difficult. Externally, I would show that I can do it but within, I was terribly unsure. This inner doubt led to stress which eventually led me to making errors even in the simplest of instructions. Due to this, not only did I lose His rajipo but Gurudev had to comment that how could He take me on any dharmayatras now. I decided to learn from my mistake and see how I can improve. The result was that I got a certificate in the next dharmayatra where Gurudev told me that He was too happy with my planning, and blessed me saying, “May you do seva like this for the rest of your life.” I understood how easy it is to win His Rajipo. I just need to be aligned to His vision, have faith on His grace upon me and then give my 100%. Everything will surely fall into place.

He constantly kept raising the bar. When I would think I have won His rajipo and I can relax, in the very next dharmayatra I would get a comment for the same thing which He would have praised in the past. He wants me to improve constantly. For instance, I would stay up full nights and do seva, Gurudev commented that this only shows that I am not doing it right. He lovingly explained to me what dharmaprabhavna really means. When other people look at my face they should feel happy and think that if seva is giving him so much happiness, then we also want to do the same. But if I am awake entire nights, naturally my face is going to look dull which will portray otherwise. And this way, He keeps pushing me to be more efficient, but also keeps pampering me with His affection side-by-side.

I used to always believe that I am a good follower and that I can never lead, because I still had those introvert characteristics alive in me. But Gurudev changes everything. Through the seva of being the Hridayarpit Group leader, Gurudev opened my personality and filled me with heaps of self-confidence. A person who earlier could not talk to people can now easily connect with anyone!

Gurudev, like a loving father, takes care of me no matter where I am. Once when I was hospitalised due to jaundice, I had to miss a pravachan and was feeling so bad that tears rolled down my eyes. Within minutes, I got a call stating that Gurudev was on His way to see me. I was thrilled, excited and my joy knew no bounds. When He arrived, He lovingly sat by my side and said, “I have come for the sevak who is offering his time in the Mission.” These words made me realise how much He values each one of us.

My journey has been joyous. Whatever I have learnt or known, is all because of His grace. Where I am today would not have been possible without the help of my family members. My father, mother and wife Amita always keep supporting me.

I just feel what more can Samyak Darshan give me than the joy I already experience in Guru darshan? I just feel what more will I get to know in Kevaljnan which I don’t get from my Guru’s Jnan? My goal is one and that is to have the devotion, which Gurudev has for Param Krupalu Dev. I wish that every second of my life I do seva, even when I am sleeping I should be doing seva in some form. I wish to dissolve myself, wherever I go I should only radiate His fragrance.